There seems to be a drought of estrogen driven writers on this web site so I figured it was my duty to step up to the plate. I will guarentee you this rant will not win any writing prize and will probably not merit further reading, but it's what's on my mind and I intend to burden you dear reader with it.
What the HELL is up with gas prices these days? In the past I would not be bothered that people were being asked to take it in the backside whenever they pulled up to the pumps. In fact, I might have been smug and said that's the price you pay for refusing to get off your lazy butt and opt to drive rather then walk or worse use public transportation. But, since deciding to stay in NYC for another year I also decided to jump back into the driver's seat and bought a car to escape from this madness whenever I saw fit. That is why I suddenly find myself in the position of scouting out gas stations around my neighborhood hoping to find one that is charging less then $3.18/gallon for the lowest grade of gas that will keep my car moving. It is insane, everyday the news reports that prices have jumped up a few more cents over the past couple of hours and there seems to be no stopping in the near future.
I understand there is a price to be paid for the priviledge of exploiting a natural resource and sure, one must not forget the damage that is being done to the environment because of exhaust pollution but geez. I'm thinking that gas should be pro-rated. If you drive an economy type car that is fuel efficient you should be able to get your gas for $2.50/gallon (OK I would be willing to go as high as $2.80). On the other hand, if you're one of those gas guzzling turds driving a ridiculously large military style vehicle to shop at the local strip mall or wherever it is you drive it to then you should pay double the price. I know this sounds steep to some of you and you may call me a nut (I won't be offended, I've probably been called worse) but that seems fair.
There are many reasons I disdain large honking SUVs and hummer type vehicles and I shall enlighten you to some of them.
First of all, they are TOO FREAKING BIG! They take up most of the road and parking spaces and I can't see around or in front of them when I am behind them.
Secondly, (and take this how you will, sorry to offend those of you who might own one...shame on you) the drivers of these vehicles in NYC are not the brightest bulbs in the bunch and are a menance on the road. For some reason the thought has not occurred to them that just because they're "safe" in their oversized death traps they don't have to follow the rules of the road. It is a truly horrifying experience to look into your rearview mirror and see a Hummer barreling down on you with the driver talking on his cellphone and oblivious of the redlight or the Ford Escort he is about to rearend fast approaching him.
The worse are the folks who think that there cars are capable of quick turns and stealth maneuvers at the flip of a switch and they decide to dart in and out of traffic that had been moving about as fast as a hair-clogged drain in desperate need of liquid plumber. It's times like these that I wished I had super powers that could deflate all four of their tires so they could go nowhere, but I digress.
In short all I am asking the govenment to do is do what they do best and start applying some of their irrational taxes and fines to these new sinners. For example, smokers are paying a hefty sin tax whenever they buy a pack of cigarettes in this country. The rational is that you know smoking is bad for you so you will pay out the buttocks if you continue to do it. Well, driving an SUV or ridiculously large vehicle (and I mean you Hummer owners) is harmful to the environment and most of the other drivers on the road with you, so you too should pay the price. If you insist on driving these monstrosities then you better be prepared to pay the price!