It's another rainy Saturday morning, when I should be painting. Instead, I'm watching out the window as a bird hops in freshly-formed puddles, and pecks in my overgrown lawn. I need to mow--it's one item on a long list of things that needs to be done.
I've allowed myself one cup of coffee. One cup before I dive into the busy day of painting, washing, building, assembling, and whatever else I can get done before I run out of time. I have a list, somewhere, of everything I wanted to get done today, but I've lost it. In between sips of coffee and typing, I am writing out a new list, and I really should put at the top, "Put list in a place where you won't lose it."
But I won't, because that just takes up space, and I need the writing room. Lists are important, these days. My brain is too frazzled to process information in the way I'm used to and comfortable with. The tricky part is, I feel like I'm still running normal, until I think back over the day and realize that I barely remember any of it. It's like being non-stop adrenaline-buzzed, and when I finally settle a bit, I'm exhausted and slightly confused about what just happened.
I went grocery shopping yesterday without a list and came home with six pounds of cherries and Sharkelberry Fin Kool Aid. I got other stuff, too, don't worry. But that's what I mainly remember. Oh, and butter.
I forgot to get ingredients for breakfast burritos, which was going to be breakfast this morning. I can have cherries, though--probably a healthier breakfast, anyway, right?
I opened up my to-do list I have on my phone and realized that the only thing on there was to buy a Crock Pot...which I bought 2 months ago. I need to do a better job of updating it. Maybe I'll put that on my list, too.
I know I have to finish painting the bathroom--that's the big one for today. Mowing is on there, too, but my mower died the other day, and I haven't replaced it, so I get to avoid that one, for the time being. There was another big project, too, but that one has slipped my mind.
We hung shelves in the baby's room last night, so that's one thing out of the way.
It's funny how my mind works, these days. I think of one thing, and the thoughts tumble out like a stuffed closet in a cartoon, where the character is suddenly piled under an avalanche of crap. My sister mentioned to me several times at lunch yesterday that my eyes gave away the panic I was feeling.
The crazy eyes, like a cat trapped in the house too long.
She assures me we'll be fine. "Pack your hospital bag, make sure you have clean clothes for the baby, and you can deal with everything else from there."
And she's right. We will be fine.
We have our hospital bag packed, and I'll get this stinkin' bathroom finished today, and then I'll move on to whatever I've remembered to put on my list next.
The last drink of lukewarm coffee tells me it's time to get to it.
Posted under The Rants on 5/16/2015