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Phone Post by Ray Printer Friendly

7:13 a.m.

My goal today is to write an entire post using only my phone. There are drawbacks--the main one being the lack of spellcheck--but I feel like it can be done.

Why am I doing this? No reason, really. It's kind of an easy way to get a post--if you count typing on a little bitty keyboard as easy. Also, I'm trying to post more this month, and since I didn't have anything yesterday, I feel like I absolutely must have something today. Plus, it's kind of neat that we have the technology to do this kind of thing, and I feel like I don't take advantage of it enough.

I'm using a Blackberry, by the way--haven't jumped onto the iPhone wagon just yet, and not really sure I want to. Everyone I know who owns one really seems to love it, but I'm not quite sold. I use my phone mostly for talking or texting, and in that aspect, I feel like the Blackberry is superior. I have tried typing on an iPhone, and it generally comes out as a garbled mess. More so than when I type on anything else, I mean.


9:56 a.m.

Another pregnant homeless chick. Really? I mean, I'm not the most responsible person in the world, but I like to think that if I was homeless and jobless, I'd have enough sense to, you know...not get knocked up.

In fact, I think I'd even go as far as to say that I might not screw at all. Which would totally be motivation to get a job. Once you get an apartment, you get to have sex.

And until then, you just pretend like you're a teenager again, creeping around under bridges and in bushes, getting quick handjobs and secret head. Are the alternatives perfect? Perhaps not. Are they better than sitting on cold concrete with a sign proclaiming to the world that you're too reckless for birth control? I think so.


10:56 a.m.

I just tried to tell a woman that she could sign anywhere on a piece of paper, but I added entirely too many s's in the sentence. So it sounded like I was some sort of hillbilly from the Bronx. "Yeah, youse can just signs anywheres on there." It was a little odd.


11:14 a.m.

There's this place I go to on a pretty regular basis, and it's by a lumber yard as well as a McDonalds.

So when the wind blows a certain way, I'm treated to the scent of freshly cut lumber, which I really enjoy. When the wind blows the other way, I'm treated to the scent of burning meat and old grease, which--as hard as it is to believe--I don't enjoy at all.

The lumber smell brings back all kinds of wonderful childhood memories. The grease smell brings back nothing but negative emotions and memories. This is probably something that deserves its own post, one that I'm not typing with my miniature phone pad keyboard.

So, yeah, I guess this is more a note to myself than an actual entry. Oops.


12:22 p.m.

So the weird thing about writing a post on my phone is that it seems incredibly long--probably due to small screen size. Which is in no way a reflection on my manhood. Seriously. My screen is a nice size.

Anyway, that's it for this post. In retrospect, the phone post was not one of my better ideas.



Posted under The Rants on 1/06/10


Comments:
Entered By Anonymous From Unknown
2010-01-07 05:27:44

I enjoy your aimless ramblings! This is almost as much fun as the monthly quotes, actually. What I have REALLY enjoyed in the past were the text conversations you transcribed for us.


Entered By Ray From Austin
2010-01-08 02:42:20

I was never sure about the text conversations, because I couldn't tell if they were as funny to others as they were to me. I've seen lots of phone/text conversations transcribed by others, and I rarely find it as amusing as they obviously do. So it's something I try to be careful with. That said, I do have a bunch of crap on my phone that I need to clear out so maybe it'll be an upcoming post.



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