There's an empty corner in my livingroom. Really it's filled with clutter right now, but when I finally put that stuff away, it'll just be empty. And it bugs the crap out of me. I want something there that I like, so that I stop thinking about it, but I don't know what to put there - I don't have anything good already which means I'd need to get something, which is a hassle, and there are plenty of things like that that I need to do already and don't.... You see how this is going.
And when I complained about this before, someone brilliant told me to put a plant there. And my gut reaction was something like "A plant???" Which is a condensed version of "A plant? Like a fake one? It would have to be a nice one, and those aren't cheap. Why would I spend money on something like that? It serves no function. And if it's a real plant, great, now I have another obligation - to water this thing and keep it alive, and what about picking it out? I have to make sure I get one that doesn't need a bunch of sun, and I'll have to leave the blinds open more."
There's a whole bunch of things like this - that don't matter much, but they still bug me, but I don't do anything about them because I'd like them taken care of well. Whatever that needs to be done to reconcile that irrational irritation, I want it done right. But most the time, I also don't want to deal with it.
I got to thinking about that corner again this morning, and as much as I thought it was silly...or something... to put a plant there, I imagined myself in the situation where all of a sudden, one day, there was just a plant there... And whether or not it was the type of thing I tried to picture for that corner, I bet it would make me happy. It would alleviate that nagging annoyance that I refuse to do anything about.
Probably. I'd think it would make the difference if I could trust that it was chosen with some thought. If not, I might still be uncomfortable. Maybe.
But if I just picked up something random and put it there, I don't think I'd feel that way. If I did it, it couldn't be anything less than exactly the right thing... Unless I'd found something close after agonizing over it for so long already that I was just tired of dealing with it, then maybe.
And that thought tires me out such that I don't want to even set out to look for something that might work. I'd rather someone else just do it.
Cause I'm probably not going to.