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Tell It by Ray Printer Friendly

Tell me you want me. Tell me you need me. Tell me you love me. Her mouth doesn’t say it, but her eyes do. Desperate and searching, wide and craving. Looking into mine, hoping to catch a romantic moment, just like in the movies, and if it isn’t really there, just give enough so that she can manufacture it in her mind, in her heart.

I can’t say no when she invites herself back to my place; we walk along the snow-blown streets and her eyes plead not acceptance but desire.

Tell me you want me. Tell me you need me. Tell me you love me. Her mouth doesn’t say it, but her hands do, frantic and fumbling, rough and hurried. Zipper yanked down too fast, buttons popped with jerky motions that remind me of a poorly scripted stop-animation film. When Gumby and Pokey decide to take it to the next level and shit gets weird. Too rushed, too awkward, and the fact that she doesn’t realize that just makes it that much worse.

Tell me you want me. Tell me you need me. Tell me you love me. Her mouth doesn’t say it, but her actions do. Her body, given too freely, to recklessly—trying to fulfill fantasies she mistakenly assumes I have. Life as a porno never works out right—the bottoms of her high heels stain my sheets and the over-enthusiastic blowjob chafes my cock.

Tell me you want me. Tell me you need me. Tell me you love me. Something I can’t tell her. Something I can’t give, something I won’t give.

I want to tell her that it’s okay. I want to tell her that she doesn’t want me, that she doesn’t need me, and that she sure as hell doesn’t love me. I want to tell her that that’s okay. I want to tell her that she should be herself and learn to love life instead of being in love with the idea of what life should be. I want to tell her that there’s no reason to try so hard to please, I want to tell her to relax. Take it easy.

But then I bust my nut.

And I want to tell her goodnight.


posted 7/12/08


Comments:
Entered By Anonymous From Unknown
2008-07-13 04:28:44

mmmmmm pure poetic justice!!



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